As I walked out and look around, I saw him still comfortably tucked in his blanket in the living hall. So, I thought to myself, I shouldn't have woken up this early. Ish.. (Haha xD) I went to the toilet and got myself washed up. Came back, he is still sound asleep. But in mind, it kept reminding me - the 11am bus. I was not feeling comfortable with that already...
We went down to a coffee shop near by for breakfast. Found my favorite "putu mayam" there, straight away I called for that. Haha..But when it was served, I saw orange "sand" beside it, and yes, it is the sugar. In Malaysia, the sugar is brown in colour. I was shocked to see orange sugar then! Haha.. But anyhow, it taste okay. Lol...Over the breakfast, talked and chat a little with the family. It's just the starting. But so far, I'm okay with them, they are very generous and friendly, am so blessed to be in this home ;)
Then, it was time. They agreed he take me around there. As we walked, he told me which landmarks and all, where to take the bus etc..As we were nearing to their house, when we're going to finish the "touring", I couldn't help it, teary eyes were on..As we were walking, my mind was just clouded with thoughts and thoughts and worse of all, he is leaving VERY SOON I thought...It was really tugging in my heart...I couldn't hold back anymore..tears streamed down my cheeks..He turned back to talk again, and when he saw me crying, he went saying, "Why are you crying?" I said, "Nah, it's nothing...." From then on as we walked back to the apartment, it was just silence all the way...and my heart went even more painful and painful...I tried to control my tears before I reach the house...but, I failed..
They said he is going to follow aunty Melissa out early then sending him to the bus stop. My eyes and lips were red already, I couldn't take it, I went straight into the room. It was a goodbye..goodbye to someone and the only one I know well here...I had this really awful feeling...I just let out in tears after the goodbye...longing for a hug from someone back at home..
This is the most terrifying experience for me. I didn't know I couldn't take it until I faced it now. When I long a hug that i couldn't get. When I woke up and find myself in this unfamiliar and strange place, or rather unknown world around me. Yes, it is terrifying! I wished it was a dream, that when I woke up again, I wouldn't see this weird world around me anymore. Strangers, unknown place, unfamiliar things around..It is my first time being away from homeland and home people for a long period of time. Who can understand how I feel? Perhaps yes, I'm not brave enough after all...I took a nap after that, because my eyes were pain..and then it was dinning out with the family...but at the end of the day, I had Haagan Daaz for free to cheer me up. Heh! xD
*If I got a hug from you, will it be any different?
yes.
Melanie
22.8.10
11.34pm
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